The day before turning 26

 It's the day before my 26th birthday and I'm surprisingly feeling ok about it. I have spent today baking cupcakes to share with my family tomorrow and a chocolate mousse cake to share with my bible study family on Wednesday night. I have done so many dishes (I'm pretty sure I washed the mix-master bowl + beaters 5 or 6 times) and there were times when I had no idea exactly what I was doing (because I keep forgetting that multitasking is hard while experiencing consistent dizziness!) but everything turned out in the end. 

If you had asked me this time last year how I saw myself celebrating my 26th birthday I would've said that I would go to work and then go out for dinner somewhere with my sister. Instead Covid has meant that my parents didn't go to Peru as planned and the economy has crashed so I don't have a job. I'm also experiencing consistent dizziness that started 9 days after I turned 25. But I know that I am exactly where God wants me, it's funny but this year is one of the first years that I haven't asked for a job. Instead I am giving it to God and letting all that anxiety go, because it's not worth the energy. So tomorrow I will go see my psychologist and then I will do some retail therapy, before we go out to dinner as a family to celebrate. I'm going to try and ignore this dizziness for at least one day and enjoy the nice Spring weather. I will probably wear this top and my sparkly silver Keds because they make me happy. Then on Wednesday night I will have a combined birthday celebration with 3 of my friends who all have birthdays in September. It's going to be a low key celebration but that's what I want, I just want to turn 26 quietly and keep taking it one day at a time and not be anxious about the future and the what ifs that keep running through my head.