Friday, February 24, 2012

Tough Times

Life isn't and wasn't meant to be easy, I think everyone whether they admit it or not, knows this. Yet we complain when things go wrong to us or we have a bad day or something didn't turn out as expected. Life is tough but after each tough time we get stronger and we are able to push ourselves that much more knowing that we can handle that next tough time ahead.

My life hasn't been easy in fact its been the opposite of easy at times. I was bullied all through school because of the way I acted, spoke differently, what I believed in, and how bad I was at sports. I was bullied physically, verbally and over the internet. Each time I struggled to get through it but I managed, I still wonder why I was bullied but the fact is I know that God only throws at us as much as we handle even though at the time it doesn't feel like it.  I love the first few verses of Psalm 27 as they let me know that God no matter what is on my side, the whole Psalm is great but its the first 3 verses that I really love and have written all over my room. Times can be tough but with God by your side nothing seems to hard to overcome

Psalm 27 (NIV)

Of David. 1 The LORD is my light and my salvation—
   whom shall I fear?
The LORD is the stronghold of my life—
   of whom shall I be afraid?
 2 When the wicked advance against me
   to devour[a] me,
it is my enemies and my foes
   who will stumble and fall.
3 Though an army besiege me,
   my heart will not fear;
though war break out against me,
   even then I will be confident.

Thursday, February 23, 2012

It's Thursday so confess

I'm not afraid to admit that I have been doing alot less blogging than I have been wanting, but anyway I am going to make up for that now! One of the blogs I read Loves Of Life did a post called It's Tuesday so Confess of course I realise that I am 2 days late to steal this idea, I actually read this post yesterday due to the fact she is in America (which is where on of my friends is leaving to go to today) and I am in Australia, but I am going to do It's Thursday so Confess. So here are my confessions.

I spend far to much time on the computer, most days I am on it for at least a few hours and when I'm not on it I'm on my iPod. Though I can happily go without it for a week when I go camping, go figure.

I watch Degrassi: The Next Generation, when its on and if I miss an episode I will catch up online. Its my weakness and the story lines are actually decent and realistic (most of the time!).

I always tell people I'm Christian after I've gotten talking to them for awhile, its kind of hard to not bring it up as I am involved in a church and I have always got something happening linked to it. I went door knocking at the local uni (where the church meets) on Monday night and had an awesome time, before that there was the Sunday night service and we had a meal after it and last thursday there was a stall I helped on at the uni O-Day and last night I had a bible study which was fun. I love being involved in the church and wouldn't have it any other way.

As many of you know I go to two churches well the church I go to in the day, I don't fit in at all ( I realised this a few weeks ago). Honestly if it wasn't for the fact that my parents dragged me to the service I wouldn't go at all. My parents keep saying I need to give it more time and I have given it 5 weeks and 2 of those weeks were good the rest not so good. I spent a church picnic on Sunday playing cut the rope on my iPod its safe to say that I didn't have fun. For now I'm going to ride it out and live for Sunday nights where I can be myself, but who knows what will happen in the future.

I want/need to get my drivers license but I haven't driven at all since December and its driving (no pun intended)me mad. Hopefully I will be able to beg dad to take me out tomorrow.

I HATE IT when people type my name without the capital 'E' (so its erin instead of Erin) I have no idea why but it always seems to make me feel less important.

I am sure I can thing of other things to confess, but for now these are things that have been on my mind.

Monday, February 20, 2012

5 things I am thankful for

Last night in church they asked us what 5 things we had been thankful for and share with the person next to us, I was in a row of 3 so I only got to list 2 (actually I was in a row of just me so I moved up the front next to 2 of the awesome people at my church). So I thought I would blog (along with the first 2 I said last night) my other 3.
  1. Being able to still live with my parents and my 2 sisters and not have to worry about the cost of living.
  2. My sisters not driving me mad this past week.
  3. Being able to freely go to church and be a christian.
  4. Being apart of an awesome church/fellowship.
  5. Having great friends who care about me and are always there to talk.
I could probably do another 10 easily but I have to leave for TAFE in 10 minutes and I don't want to be late and miss my bus!

Saturday, February 18, 2012

Hectic week=no blogging

My life has been hectic lately due to the fact that I started a new TAFE course (Business cert.3) and my sisters birthday party which was today (and has just ended, though we still have people here). I have HATED the fact that I haven't been able to blog, I like to aim to blog every 2 days but it just hasn't happened at all this past weeks which I have HATED. So I am hoping that this week will be better on the blogging front. So here are things that I have been up to:
  • Went shopping with my friend Barcode (there will be a comic detailing our adventures!).
  • Started Business cert.3 so far my anxiety hasn't been troubling me at all.
  • Made a birthday ice cream for my sisters birthday (she is gluten intolerant so can't have wheat), which was a hit, for the first time we had no cake left.
  • Gotten mad at myself for not blogging at all.
  • Helped promote my church at the uni we meet at, we are hoping some people will turn up on Sunday night.

Friday, February 10, 2012

Anxiety Attack

Right now, I should be walking to the bus so I can head to TAFE, but I'm not. Yesterday morning, I awoke with a bit of anxiety and despite some struggles I went to TAFE, I was going fine until it was morning break time and then I began to loose it, so determined not to totally loose it I distracted myself and when into class kinda ok (my eyes were red from beginning to cry but that was it) then for now reason I had a full on anxiety attack, I was struggling to catch my breath and could not calm down (no matter how hard I tried!), I ended up being sent home (my lecturer was very understanding and said that it wasn't my fault even though I felt it was), where I couldn't sit or stay still, I wanted to go to sleep but the moment I laid down I was restless this went on for the rest of the day. I posted about it on facebook and all my friends were very understanding which was nice. This morning I awoke and my anxiety immeadiatly kicked back in so there was no way I would be going to TAFE today.

The last time I had an anxiety was when I was 12 and that was before I got help. I have never experienced anything like what I had yesterday and that scares me as it could easily happen again. I have no idea what I should do about it, and feel like a failure even though I had no power to control it. So now I guess I have to pray about what I should I do about it.

Sunday, February 5, 2012

Two churches

Its hard fitting in a new church and its even harder fitting in two new churches, yet I have some how managed to fit into two. When ever I tell someone I am going to two different churches their reactions are always how do you manage that?! Truthfully I don't know, but I love going to both :) both are filled with awesome people, both have great teaching and both have accepted me and welcomed me in. I can't imagine not going to either, right now I am tired yet in half an hour I am going to go to my next church service of the day,  as I have been looking forward to it. I have made friends in both and feel that I can get involved in both. I have no desire to stop going to either of them, and truthfully why would I want to?!

Thursday, February 2, 2012

TAFE Orientation

I had my TAFE orientation today and I think I did ok, I caught 2 buses and arrived with time to spare. I honestly had no idea how today would go, I was worried that my anxiety would take over me and I would leave the house in hysterics or something, thankfully that didn't happen, instead I found myself enjoying it at times. The orientation was for business and finance students (around 50 I'm guessing), the finance students were about a 3rd of the people at the orientation the rest were business and then only around 7 of them were doing Business Administration cert 3 (the course I am doing). The funny thing is (and God defiently had a hand in it) as I was walking from the bus stop to TAFE I met a girl who was doing the exact same course as me and we hit it off, so I already have one friend in the course which I am hapy about. I am sorry that this is so short but I am falling asleep as I am typing this so I am off to bed!

Wednesday, February 1, 2012

Friends are . . . (and Barcodes drawing)

Friends are
Friends are mind readers quiet often they know what you are thinking before you even say it.
Friends are people who care for you and you know they will always be there to pick up pieces.
Friends are random strangers who once they get to know real you they don't run off.
Friends are people who you can joke around with and won't judge you.
Friends are awesome people.
Friends are people who make a huge difference on your life.
But most of all Friends are friends!