Friday, April 26, 2013

Some job news

On Monday I chopped most of my hair off, it now sits above my shoulders (its fine and there is a lot of it so the longer it gets the more knotts and harder it is to get them out) as it was getting chopped I was thinking to myself as this happening I am saying goodbye to the hardness of the past few months and are going to try to think positive.
On Wednesday I had an employment agency meeting which as always went well :) we discussed how bad the job market is at the moment and she told me that she found a job that she thought I should apply for. It had been advertised on a website that I don't often visit (it confuses me) but it had junior and part time in the title, it also wasn't that far away and I knew the area and that it was near a bus route (the same bus I caught to TAFE), I seemed to fit the job description (the role included: data entry, cash handling, typing of documents, light cleaning ect), they also needed someone who could start ASAP so I decided to apply. I sent off my resume at 10.00 Wednesday morning and at 6.00 Wednesday night I had a call from them saying that I seemed to match what they were looking for and could I come in on Friday morning for an interview though if I got the job I would start on Monday and would that be ok.
Today I had the interview, it went well I joked with the girls who if I got the job I would work with, I mentioned my anxiety and they were totally fine with it. I felt a bit over dressed as they were in jeans and I was in black pants, a nice top and heels (they like their employees to be comfortable so its really up to them what they wear). Then this afternoon at 3.00 I got a call from them asking the job was mine if I wanted it, I was in the car (not driving though!) so I couldn't really scream and jump around like I wanted to, but I texted 5 people who had known about the interview and had been praying for me during my time of unemployment.
I start Monday at 12 noon and its for a company that teaches kids how to play instruments so the hours are a bit strange and I will either be working 11.00am to 3.00pm or 3.00pm to 7.00pm though on Thursdays it will be 11.00am to 7.00pm and on every 2nd Saturday I will be working 8.30am to 4.30pm (its a job share). I start training on Monday morning at 12 noon which is exiting and I can't wait to get back into the work force, I know it won't be easy but I also know that God will be with me each step of the way.
Of course this means that in a few weeks time I will be able to adopt a kitten (its my reward to me) which is exiting and I can't wait to have a furry little friend to baby (Tom isn't cutting it, I was woken up on Monday with him in my face sneezing!).

Sunday, April 21, 2013

Sundays

I love Pinterest and I love finding quotes that I can relate to so here are the quotes that have touched me most recently, just because its a Sunday and sometimes we all need encouragement.
I found this one today and it really hit me. I also thinks it applies to me in rekindling relationships and why God brought people who I haven't seen in years back into my life when he did (especially most recently!).



 When I was 15 in my Christian Education class we all had to give a talk on a random topic the teacher choose for each of us. I got Love and I remember saying that God is Love and without God there is no Love.
I ask myself this question daily.
and this is how I answer the above question
Something we all should do more and need to be reminded of.
Sometimes the best thing you can do for yourself is realise that you need to move on no matter how much is hurts to accept it.
Wise words.
Very true and no one should ever doubt it.
He will never leave you.
Something I need to work on. I am finally learning that when I am worrying to pray.
Being yourself will get you the guy in the long run.
More wise words
Something I need to work on.
God will help you no matter how broken your heart is.


















Thursday, April 18, 2013

A better week

This week has been a better week, though it has been a lot like last week. I have had no interviews and no jobs have been advertised that match what I am looking for, but I have been busy which has made a huge difference. I went into the city to meet a friend on Monday for coffee and did a bit of shopping, I got my Mum a Mothers Day gift (I like to be organised) and bought myself a blue nose friend because sometimes you just need a little pick me up :). Tuesday was spent trying to catch up on sleep and I went shopping for a pair of jeans at my local Good Sammys (Op shop/thrift shop) and I found the perfect pair in near new condition for only $5 they fit me perfectly and are exactly what I wanted. Wednesday I had an employment agency meeting which went well, we disscussed my mock interview that I had the other week to see if my interview technique needs working on and the possibilty of getting work experience at a business that works with kids with disabilities (that deals with my sister who has Down Syndrome) and a driving lesson which I survived. Today I caught up on sleep and didn't get out of bed until 11.00am (my sleep has been off the past week and I have been lucky to get 5 hours so I managed to get a full 11 hours of deep sleep) and then decided to make buttermilk scones which turned out amazingly and ate 5 of them because I could.

School holidays start on Friday which means the next two weeks should fly by, as having sisters and Mum home? Means theres never a dull moment and always lots to do.

The above photo is of my Blue Nose Friend (I have wanted one for ages), a skunk which I have named Blossom and the photo on the left is of my latest obession: fabric tape which I purchased off ebay ($5 for all the rolls including postage), I know one of the big trends on Pintrest is Washi tape but fabric tape has so many more uses and is more durable.

Saturday, April 13, 2013

Waiting

The hardest thing about unemployment is the waiting. You wait for jobs to come to up that match what you are looking for so you can apply to them, you wait for phone calls about interviews, you wait for the interview to come and spend a good hour getting ready plus travel time and finally you wait to see if you have the job or not. Its a waiting game and it doesn't go quickly either on average it can be anywhere from 1 day (in extremely rare cases) or 1 month to find out if you have an interview or not then it can be be anywhere from 1day to 1 week to find out if you have the job or not. Its a long wait and in a world where we're used to getting everything now, it can be a learning curve.

Then you have the waiting time that needs to be filled this is the hardest part for me. There is only so many days a girl can take watching movies and being lazy and if you don't fill those days then you get depressed and it goes downhill from there. This past week I have been boardering on depressed and fine, I have spent the bulk of my days at home because I have no money and my sleep has been off for some reason. Thursdays are my worst day as every Thursday I always feel 'down' and nothing helps me get out of that feeling, the rest of the days can be bad but I never reach as low as I do on Thursdays.

I posted this on my Facebook page on Thursday: The hardest part of trusting God with your future is when you have no idea what you should be doing then you realise that this is all in God's plan.
As much as I hate waiting, its all in God's plan for me and I know the reward will be worth it. I know that some days and weeks will be harder than others its just learning to stay focused on the big picture and 100% trusting in God.

Tuesday, April 9, 2013

Promises

Promises are things that are made easily and often thrown around like they mean nothing. Almost every advert on TV promises you something, "This hair style tool will make you throw away all your other styling tools!" "Your hair will want to make you jump for joy when you use this shampoo" "This knife will always be sharp!" "When you give your kids these vitamins you will notice a change in their behaviour, IQ and they will be little angels!" "Your cat will dance with you when you give them this cat food" these are just some of the promises products make, very little of them are true. Promises are not only thrown around in advertisments but in real life too and it can seem like the only point of promising something is to make the person happy for a short period then make them upset when they realise it isn't true.

This attitude can then be transferred onto promises that actually mean something and matter such as marriage vows. The divorce rate is quite high and is always raising partly due to people getting told when you marry someone it isn't a permanent thing and its ok to change your mind after a few years. For Christians marriage is a sacred thing and the wedding vows are not only a promise to each other but to God too.

In the bible God promises many and each one happens. After the floods he promised that there would never be big flood again and sure parts of the world do flood but none of them have ever been even remotely close in size to the one Noah built the ark for. He promised that whoever believes in him shall go to heaven and live with him forever and its the truth. God has promised many things and each one he meant, he didn't promise something then go back on it.

Promises should never be taken lightly, though in this society they often are and its sad. Next time you promise something mean it.

This post has been sitting in the draft section of my blog for quite some time but when a friend liked the above picture on Facebook, I felt I should finish it off. 

Monday, April 8, 2013

Finding an escape

Blogging is the only that is making sense at the moment. I can't believe I am admitting it but lately I spend all my time listening to music and either going through a draft post (always the same one) or waiting for inspiration for a new post. The job front is looking bad and once again I can feel myself slowly loosing grip on the positives and focusing on the negatives. I find myself wanting to hit my head against a wall and wondering what on earth is happening to me. This time 2 weeks ago I was confident and the feeling of confidence made me come alive, now I am a just a shell of it.
None of my stratergies are helping me, things that have always worked aren't working, I am loosing focus and nothing is helping me refocus. Today I was in a down mood and nothing was working, even my iftheworstcomestotheworst stratergies weren't working. I tried to cry but no tears came, going on my favourite funny websites didn't produce any laughter or emotion, baking bread (it somehow helps me feel better) made me mad at the dough- even though it worked perfectly!
I can't and won't give up on finding a job and even though I have no idea what I am supposed to be doing at the moment, I will keep searching until it does.
I need an escape yet I can't seem to find one and am beginning to wonder if I ever will.

Saturday, April 6, 2013

Its ok to cry

A while ago I was having a bad day, nothing was particulary bad about it I just felt down and nothing was helping me get out of the mood. Eventually the tears came and as they made their way down my face I felt better not a lot but a bit so I let them fall I was sick of putting on my 'I'm ok face' and came to the realisation that sometimes its ok to cry. I needed to let everything out and if crying silent tears was the way to do it then so be it.
That was a while ago and since then I have done it a few times and each time I haven't felt ashamed or angry at myself for letting the tears fall. Sometimes the only way to move forward is to let the tears fall. Some days you just need to take a mental health day and spend the day doing nothing, turn off from the world and just do whatever it takes to get you back up to being able the face the next challange. I spent Friday doing nothing, I baked cookies then ate them for lunch just because I could, went through past blog posts and texted friends because I knew if I didn't take some time out I wouldn't be able to face the next week.
This coming week has nothing planned yet in a way it does, I want to go and visit the building where I did work experience with brownies, I want to have coffee with a few friends and I hopefully will have a few more job interviews. I have come to the realisation that I am not in control of my life- God is and he was all along and whatever he plans for me I will accept.

Friday, April 5, 2013

Waiting and praying

I sometimes wish I could see into the future, not my whole life just 3 years ahead. Maybe then I wouldn't feel worthless at times or get discouraged when I get interviews but not jobs. I wonder what job I would be working, whether I would have a boyfriend or not, if I would adopt the kitten I so want, if I did travel over east to see my nieces and nephew celebrate their first birthday or not, what car I would be driving. It would give me the peace of mind realising that life does get better.

Yesterday I knocked back an interview, it was too hard to get to yes I was probably making it more complicated than it really was to get to but I knew where it was (I lived around the area many years ago and drove past the building a fair bit) and I couldn't see myself making the trek to it by public transport. Yes I can see myself getting my license by the end of the year but at the moment I don't have it in me to catch 2 buses and a train to it. I also knew the chances getting the job was slim and when you have had a busy week sometimes having a job interview on top of everything else that has been happening is to much for me emotionally. For me to knock back interviews isn't new I have done it a few times because of various reasons and I have never regretted doing it.

I have been missing work experience alot this past week, it gave me a purpose and it something to do. I loved being busy and throwing myself into working. For it to end feels strange but I am praying a job comes up at the uni soon and maybe in a few weeks I will get a call regarding more work that I can do, I just don't know.

Today I intend to my day making cookies and making cards whilist watching Pitch Perfect (third time this week and I can quote almost all of Fat Amy's lines, don't judge) because I need a mental health day, before I face the real world again. Because lets face it some days its ok to sleep in and have no desire to do anything other than craft and bake because if I don't look after my mental health then I will get no where any time soon.

Wednesday, April 3, 2013

An update on the job seeker front

I have an intense post coming up, but I am currently waiting to get feedback on it as I am still not 100% sure that it gets the point(s) across.

I am back to square one again this week and I am not enjoying it all. Today I had another employment agency meeting which went well but led no where. I was asked if I had any back up jobs that I wouldn't mind doing and honestly I don't. I would love to be an author but that takes time and though I one day hope to be one I need money and security, web design is another thing I enjoy yet I don't have the training and my skills need developing. Administration is the only thing I have ever felt I could do, sure I have hobbies but none of them leave anywhere. Writing is the only hobby I can see leading me somewhere but not at the moment or any time soon.

I know that the job market is tough but the thing is I have God on my side and I know if I trust him I will get the perfect job.

Yesterday afternoon I put on Pitch Perfect (I can probably quote most of Fat Amy's lines haha) and made the building where I did work experience a card to say Thank You, it was the least I could do for them all. I honestly doubt they know how much they helped me and I felt that a bought card wouldn't do justice. It turned out better than expected (amazing what some coloured paper, a few flower punches, some buttons, glitter and a scrap of ribbon can do!) and I can't wait to make a few more cards like this one (might be able to use up most of paper scraps in my craft box).


I am hoping the post will up by the end of the week, I am warning you guys it is intense but it needs to be out there.