People keep asking me how I stay so positive throughout all this time of being unemployed and the truth is I have to be otherwise I would break and get into a hole that I would never get out of. The thing is I do break at times, especially after I find out I don't get jobs that I want and felt that could be 'The job'. I hate breaking and wish I could stay positive all of the time but its not possible, I know there is job out there for me but I feel like I will never find it and each time I get knocked back I find myself just a bit closer to giving up completely.
I know I should be thankful that I have a good support system but its hard when so many of them have their lives together and then there's me the unemployed person who has to wait another 3 months until she can drive.
I turn twenty in less than 2 weeks and I know I should be exited, it means I am leaving my teenagehood behind but how can be exited when its looking like I will still be unemployed and will be a similar place where I was last year. Honestly all I want for my birthday is a job, I want to be able move forward and start saving for a car and wake up with a purpose but that chances of getting a job in less than 2 weeks seems impossible.
I know that God has a plan for me and trust him completely but I wish he would hurry up with it!