It's scary how songs can mirror your life at times? I mean honestly it seems like Glee does it to me all the time it started with, Get It Right and now they have done it again with Pretending. I mean its scary how they sing songs that mirror how I am feeling and they always release them around the time when I am feeling them!
Things are beginning to get better slowly, I am beginning to feel myself but even thats taking time. I am wondering if I will ever be 100%. I have realised that being honest with myself has consquences, but whats the point of not being honest with myself if I feel like I am living a lie?! I am also learning to speak out about how I am feeling, I am sick of people ignoring my feelings, honestly it seems at times that no one wants to know how I am feeling, one day I went around doing my business and barely talking to anyone and 'wore' what I was feeling just to see if anyone noticed which no one did! This upsets me, I mean if more people noticed how people were feeling, our depression rate would be much lower, all it takes is someone to ask how your doing and generally mean it, to make you feel a bit better (I know this from experience!).
I find that right now all I can do is listen to myself and take things a step at the time (which I am doing). I also need to find confidence in myself seeing as I have little. So I am hoping slowly I will feel more like myself but until then I am just taking small and steady steps until I am 100%.