I turn 22 in one month and I honestly couldn't care less! 21 was meant to be the year that everything clicked together and all my struggling ended but no instead I am still struggling and I honestly have no idea what I am doing with my life. When I left my last job I had set myself a goal of having a job before my Birthday, I figured 7 months that should be easy but I am realising that I am wrong, at this stage it will be nothing short of a miracle if I get a job and I am slowly beginning to accept that I may be spending my birthday being unemployed. I have always said that God has a plan for my life and I know that he does, its just hard to see what exactly it is.
2 weeks ago I got a call saying I had been shortlisted for a job and that I would get another call in a few days time letting me know when the interview would be. I ended up spending all of last week trying to get hold of someone, anyone who could give me some answers and I have yet to hear back. I know God is in control of the whole situation but my anxiety levels are slowly rising being left in the dark with this job. I also felt like maybe I was getting somewhere and that I could see the light at the end of the tunnel, which is slowly fading to a speck the longer I don't hear back (I ended up emailing them today as a last resort so hopefully that works). I am just praying that it works out and I do eventually get to have the interview.
I have a lot of people who are keeping an eye out for jobs for me and that's really encouraging and helps me feel not so alone. As people keep telling me, I will get a job eventually; my resume is great and I am doing everything in my power to find a job, I don't let my anxiety get in the way, its just a matter of finding a good supportive job and staying in it.
I just feel like this year isn't my year and its not easy to keep staying positive!