Yesterday after hearing the news about the getting job I throw myself into job applications. I always find it strange how between the interviews and the waiting periods after the interviews that there is always no jobs for me to apply for but as soon as I receive the news that I didn't get the job a whole stack of jobs come up. I have to be picky when it comes to jobs not because I want to be but in order to take care of my mental health I have to choose jobs that have decent environments and are part time as full time overwhelms me and causes my anxiety to go haywire. I managed to apply for 3 suitable jobs which is a record for me considering the job market at the moment! One required a selection criteria which I do not like doing but thankfully I was able to copy and paste some answers from previous criteria's I have done for the same place (but different departments) which got me through to the interview rounds both times (maybe it will be 3rd time lucky?). I also added to the answers where I could to show more of my experience but it was helpful having the base answers done.
The other 2 jobs were ones I felt I could do and matched my experience really well. I am sticking to more admin based jobs rather than customer service. I did ring up a caring agency that had casual carers advertised but I felt overwhelmed especially as I have no formal qualifications and if I did get the job I would have to get a first aid certificate, up my car insurance and change my car registration which is freaking me out even thinking about it! I may go back and look into it more but at this stage I don't think its the right direction for me.
I also had a psych appointment yesterday afternoon (it always amazes me that I have the appointments booked just when I need them!) and the timing was perfect, my anxiety was on edge due to finding out regarding the job and the long drive helped clear my head as well. I just love being able to pour everything out and get a different perspective on things. My psych after hearing about the job I went for and what it would've involved told me that she didn't feel like the job would've been a good fit for me and that the perfect job for me is still out there and I shouldn't feel like a failure. I also should focus on the good points especially as my interview game is on point and my references are good. Its hard to believe what a rollercoaster you can go on in only 3 weeks! I told her about the jobs I applied for and she felt that any of them would be a much better fit for me, so now its just up to God to do his work!
I do feel like its hard to trust God with all of this but this year at church we are focusing on prayer so its been a good reminder to keep praying to God through it all. I tend to pray a lot when I am driving as its something I can easily do without actually having to set the time aside. I just have to keep remembering also that God did one miracle with getting my license back so he can do another with finding me the right job. I know my life has never been easy but I just have to trust that God is using me for him and that he will guide me through everything.